We all know ourselves better than anyone… all of our deepest desires, dreams and failures are apart of our uniqueness and individuality. These desires, dreams or failures may be often left unsaid, kept neatly tucked away from the people in our lives.
It can be scary opening up to others about what makes you tick, for fear of being judged, laughed at or pushed aside. Not everyone gets applauded for what they do or who they are. Life can be silent at times for the ordinary people of this world.
Routines are followed day in and day out with the best intentions to have a fulfilling and satisfying life. Deep down we all share the same knowledge that there is no guarantee of ultimate success in all area of our lives.
When we experience unavoidable failure the lessons are priceless.
The lessons are there to keep us on the right path, to stay focused. The lessons learned provides us with an anchor to grab onto especially when we run the risk of not thinking straight about a given situation. While feelings are wonderful, feelings can have us rushing into things all too quickly….
Long before I learnt any gut wrenching lessons I made very quick irrational decisions as a young person. Young people need time to mature.
Take your time young person….
While it may feel like life is going too slow and you desperately want things to speed up, take your time before you put that foot on the accelerator and consider all of your options. You have plenty of time ahead of you.
Young lady please hear me. Don’t settle for any boy. The temporary comfort that helps you feel less lonely will only grow into deep loneliness later down the track if the person you are considering spending the rest of your life with is not good for you. A real man may have areas they are yet to mature in however if their character and how they treat you currently is creating anxiety and turmoil beyond the normal then they may not be for you.
If your instincts are telling you that something is not right then it probably isn’t. I had learned to shut down my instincts. To the point in which I didn’t even trust myself. When another persons values don’t match up with yours you will find yourself battling a feeling of contradiction. Life will be a regular let down. You have a desire to do something a certain way and the person you have attached yourself too goes about it completely differently. As an example; you may be someone that loves to budget and keep your finances in order. The person you have attached yourself too may have no desire to budget and worse yet they may accrue debts and choose to never repay them. You may even have conversations around this and explain how important it is for your values to be aligned which includes being cautious and mindful of your bank balance. You may further state your values in repaying people what you owe them. Despite your best efforts the person you have attached yourself too may hear what you are saying and yet continue living life they way they see fit.
You maybe a person that likes to treat others with respect. When you attach yourself to a person who sees no purpose for being respectful you will find yourself struggling. It is impossible to continue being with someone who treats others as though they have no value. The same way they treat others they will treat you.
Dear young lady; never put yourself into a relationship in which you are treated with no respect. A true man would not put you down in front of others. A true man would take your concerns seriously and make a true effort to be the man you deserve to have. A true man would take responsibility for their decisions with the purpose of keeping their loved ones safe and secure. A true man would not put you in situations that have the potential to break you in pieces. A true man listens to you. A true man doesn’t ignore you and give you the silent treatment. A true man doesn’t thrive on arguing. A true man creates an environment of trust and safety.
While it may feel like an eternity to be patient, take your time, you will save yourself so much heart ache and pain. You will have a lot more happier days then bad ones when you choose well.
TAKE YOUR TIME….